Bittersweet
by Ababy99
Summary: NB. After Brooke feels the guilt of sleeping with Nathan when he's married. She leaves Tree Hill and North Carolina all together. But what happens when the person she loves needs her the most? RR
1. 1 Confessions

Brooke sat down in the confessional and took a deep breath, "Forgive me Father for I have sinned…" She began, "I've never really done this before so I guess it's been never since my first confession," she said with a nervous laugh. Brooke cleared her throat and looked down at her trembling hands, "I've been doing a lot of bad things lately," she started, "Drinking, having pre-marital sex…" She bit her bottom lip, "I've been sleeping with a married man," Brooke said as a small tear fell from her eyes, "I know it's wrong, and I know I'm wrong for doing…But I love this guy so, so, so much Father," Brooke said.

"I've known this guy since I was young," Brooke explained, "We're 17, and he's married to one of my friends…The last thing I want is for him or his wife to get hurt, but I can't stop myself from seeing him. We love each other and we've always loved each other. Nathan and I are best friends!"

The priest nodded his head, "What you are doing is committing adultery," he told her, "You can't let the devil tempt you to do wrongful things."

"I'm sorry Father," Brooke said softly, "But he shouldn't be with her…"

"It doesn't matter, my dear," the priest said, "You're not only hurting Nathan and his marriage, but you're hurting yourself…"

Brooke looked down at her trembling hands and couldn't breathe right, "I need to be loved…"

"Everyone does," he said, "But you're just finding the wrong ways to fill those voids that you have…"

Brooke nodded her head, "Okay," was all she had to say.

"Do five Hail Mary's," the priest said and Brooke walked out of the confessional.

Brooke looked around the big church and then walked outside. She got into her car and the rain beat hard against the window. Brooke drove to Nathan's apartment and knocked on the door. She stood outside until Nathan answered the door.

"Brooke," he greeted her, "What's up?"

Brooke looked down at the ground, "I came to talk to you…"

"Well," Nathan said opening the door wider, "Haley's not here right now and she'll be back in an hour or so…"

Brooke shook her head, "No," she said sternly, "That's not why I came."

"Oh," Nathan said in surprise, "Then…what's wrong?"

Brooke sighed, "I went to that church today…"

"You haven't been in a church since your cousin died," Nathan said.

"See," Brooke exclaimed, "You're the only one who knows about that, and we've ruined our friendship completely!"

Nathan looked at her in confusion, "What? Brooke, what the hell are you talking about?"

"We've ruined everything between us Nathan," Brooke said quietly, "We used to be best friends…And now you just treat me like some little toy that you can play with and then toss away whenever you feel like it," she said without looking at him.

Nathan crossed his arms, "You came because you don't want to hook up anymore?"

"I came because I'm leaving," she said, "I can't be here…I can't be here with you, or with Haley."

Nathan sighed, "Brooke…Don't leave because of this," he said motioning between the two of them.

"We're not even friends anymore!" Brooke cried, "We turned into friends with benefits, and we both know that shit doesn't work out!"

"Brooke," Nathan said trying to calm her down, "Look, the last thing I want you to do is move away. You're my best friend, Brooke!"

Brooke shook her head, "I can't do this anymore Nate," Brooke said as she wiped a tear away, "I can't keep lying to everyone…I can't stop lying to myself."

"Don't leave Brooke," Nathan said sternly, "I love you."

Brooke slammed her hand down on the kitchen table, "No you don't! You have no idea what love is anymore Nathan!" She screamed, "Stop doing this to me, I am so sick and tired of being lied to."

"I'm not lying to you," Nathan said in defense.

"We're not in love Nathan," Brooke said softly, "We're just friends that let things get out of hand…"

Nathan sat down and put his head in his hands, "You can't just pack up and leave, Brooke…"

"I've already made plans," Brooke said, "I'm getting the fuck out of this place, and starting a new life…"

Nathan looked up at her, "Because you hate me?"

"No," Brooke answered half truthfully, "Because I hate myself…"

Nathan stood up and looked down at her, "You'll be back, Davis," he said knowingly, "You can't leave this place for good…"

"Don't be so sure," Brooke said, "What we had was great," she said and turned towards the door, "But I can't keep doing this to people that I love," she said and then walked out of the apartment.

Brooke drove over to Peyton's house and walked up to her room. She stood in the doorway and saw Peyton and Anna laughing and listening to Peyton's god awful music. Brooke knocked softly on the door, but they didn't notice. Brooke rolled her eyes and pounded on the door.

Peyton looked over and smiled at Brooke, and then turned off the music, "Brooke!" She exclaimed and then bounced over towards her friend, "You made it in time just for the party!" Anna laughed at Peyton's giddiness.

Brooke rolled her eyes, "I wanted to talk to you about something," she said quietly.

Anna came over towards Peyton and smiled at Brooke, "Alright, we'll all go down to the River court and talk," she butted in.

"Actually," Brooke said, "I just meant Peyton and me…"

Peyton gave Brooke a look, "Come on Brooke…You don't mind if Anna comes?"

"Yes I do mind!" Brooke shouted angrily, "Peyton I just want to talk to you!"

Peyton rolled her eyes, "If it's about Felix or any other guy you've hooked up with then I'm guessing it can wait till tomorrow," she said and then shifted her weight.

Brooke crossed her arms and looked around the room and saw a drawing of Anna with the words "Best Friend" sketched onto the drawing. Brooke looked Peyton dead in the eye, "Who the hell are you?" She asked coldly, and then walked out of the room.

Brooke got into her car and slammed the door; hard. She pulled out of the driveway and started to cry to herself. Brooke drove down the road and saw the sign "Leaving Tree Hill" and she smiled sadly to herself.

"Passengers leaving Charleston, North Carolina and going to New York your plane is boarding now," Brooke heard the person say. She walked onto the plane and sat at a window seat. Brooke looked out the window and put on her headphone.

She knew that she was leaving behind a lot of friends and a lot of memories. Well, at least people she thought were friends. Everything was going fine until she started sleeping with Nathan, and everything was going fine before Anna came along. Brooke fell asleep on the plane and woke up when she heard, "We are now landing in New York."

Brooke got off the plane and got her luggage. She walked out of the airport and saw Jake standing there. Brooke walked over to him and jumped into his arms, "Thank you so much Jake," she whispered into his ear.

"How are you doing, Brookie?" He asked with a warm, gentle voice.

Brooke sighed, "Better now that I'm out of Tree Hill."

Jake laughed softly, "Come on," he said picking up one of Brooke's suitcase.

They both walked into Jake's apartment and Brooke was impressed at how nice and clean it was, "Wow Jake," she began, "This is a really nice place."

"I try," Jake said with a hint of humor, "Your room is kind of plain…I thought maybe you'd like to decorate that yourself."

Brooke smiled, "Thanks…"

"I know how much you like to hang pictures of you and Peyton up all around," Jake said.

The sound of Peyton's name brought sadness to Brooke's heart, "Peyton doesn't even know I'm gone…"

"What?" Jake asked, "How could she not know?"

Brooke sighed, "I went to tell her, and she was with her new best friend. Anna…"

"Anna?" Jake asked.

Brooke sat down on the couch, "New girl from wherever who is annoying and just…"

Jake got two cold beers out of the fridge and sat down beside Brooke, "Tell me about what's been going on in Tree Hill since I've been gone," he said handing Brooke a beer.

Brooke opened the beer and sighed, "Haley and Nathan got married. Lucas is back. Peyton and Anna are best friends. Peyton did coke once, and she and Karen opened up a new club."

"Peyton did coke?" Jake asked.

Brooke took a sip of her beer and nodded, "You really care about her don't you?" She asked.

"Of course I do," Jake said, "I don't see why she'd be doing coke…"

Brooke shrugged, "She's missing you like crazy, Jake…"

Jake looked down at his beer, "I miss her too," he said softly, "When did Haley and Nathan get married?"

"After the championship basketball game I guess," Brooke said as she slouched down into the couch, "And…" She began, "Nathan and I started sleeping together a little bit before he and Haley got married, and today is when I stopped it."

Jake looked at Brooke and saw the sadness and disappointment in her eyes, "Brooke," he said softly, "Are you okay?"

"No," Brooke said as she began to cry, "I love him Jake…You know how close Nathan and I are, well, were," she said, "I can't help but love him…"

Jake put his arm around Brooke and let her lay against him, "I know, babe," he said as he kissed the top of Brooke's head, "He loves you too…"

"Then why did he marry her?" Brooke asked as her voice cracked.

Jake rubbed Brooke's back, "I don't know…"

Peyton sat in her room and got her phone, she called Brooke cell phone. She knew that Brooke was royally pissed at her for hanging out with Anna, but Anna was a really cool girl, and Peyton enjoyed her company. "Hey this is Brooke I'm not here right now…" Her voice mail began.

Peyton heard the beep and sighed, "Hey Brooke. It's Peyton. Look, I know that you're really mad about what happened today, but I couldn't just blow off Anna. Whatever you had to say I'm sorry if it was really important, but if you're still awake or sober then just call me, and I'll come over. Bye," she said and hung up the phone.

Nathan shot up a jump shot and missed terribly. He sighed and walked over towards the picnic table and sat down. He saw Haley walking towards him, she sat down beside him and looked up at the sky, "I'm sorry I've been coming home late these last couple of days," she started.

"Whatever," Nathan said.

Haley looked at him, "I really am sorry Nate," she said, "It's just all this music stuff and…"

"And Chris," Nathan said with anger rising in his voice.

Haley sighed, "He means nothing to me."

"Oh really?" Nathan asked, "So that's why you stay out till 3 in the morning in a studio with him all night?"

"Stop it," Haley said sternly, "This isn't fair to do to me!"

Nathan scoffed, "Fair to you?"

"Look…" Haley began.

"No," Nathan said sternly, "I've given up everything for you Haley! And all I want you to do is not hang out with that creep anymore, is that really too much to ask?"

Haley looked down at the ground, "I can't do that…He can get me places Nathan."

"The only place he wants to get you is down his pants," Nathan snapped back.

Haley glared at him, "That was really low of you!"

"It's true," Nathan yelled, "All he sees is an innocent, beautiful girl!"

Haley ran her hand through her hair, "I would never do anything to hurt you Nathan!" She exclaimed, "You know that!"

"I trust you Hales!" Nathan said, "I just don't trust that bastard…"

Haley put her hands on her hips, "Asking me to not sing with Chris is like me asking you not to hang out with Brooke anymore!"

"Brooke and I are best friends," Nathan shouted, "You and Chris barely know each other, and plus Brooke and I would never do anything together," he lied.

Haley rolled her eyes, "I know Nathan I know. I love Brooke to death, she is a great friend. I'm just saying you can't choose who I can or can't be in the company of!"

"If you loved me then you wouldn't see him anymore," Nathan said and then began to walk away.

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	2. 2 Walking Alone Tonight

Brooke woke up to a new room and a new life. She looked around the guest bedroom Jake had for her; it really wasn't her style, but she wasn't going to complain. Brooke got up out of bed and went over to her suitcase which she hadn't even begun to unpack yet. She sat on her knees and unzipped it; the first thing she saw was a picture of her and Peyton.

She smiled as she remembered the day the picture was taken; they were up at the beach and had just got done skinny dipping. Brooke sighed and set down the picture sadly; she looked through the rest of her pictures and saw a picture of her and Nathan after one of his games. Brooke was dressed in her cheerleading outfit with an "R" painted on her face and Nathan had his arm around her smiling because of their big win.

Brooke closed her eyes for a moment. She truly missed Nathan, and not just because of the sex. They were best friends and they loved each other. Brooke put the picture back in her suitcase and got up and walked into the kitchen. She saw Jake attempting to feed Jenny and Brooke chuckled to herself.

Jake looked over towards her and smiled, "Morning sunshine," he said, "I made some bacon and eggs," Jake said pointing over to the table where a plate was already set out, "I thought you'd be hungry."

Brooke smiled at him and then sat down at the table, "You were right," she said taking a bite of her bacon, "Crispy…Just the way I like it!"

"I know," Jake said with a warm smile, "It's good to cook for someone again."

Brooke laughed, "I can't believe you haven't found yourself a girlfriend, Jakey," she said winking at him, "You're not that bad looking," she teased.

"Jenny's the only girl I need in my life right now," Jake said admiring his beautiful daughter, "Well, and except for you Brooke, but I'm kind of stuck with you," he said with a smile that Brooke knew he was kidding.

Brooke stuck her tongue out at him, "You know that you needed the company."

"True," Jake said nodding his head, "Hey, get ready. I'm going to take you around New York, show you what really city life is like."

Nathan walked into his apartment and heard a piano playing back in his room. He smiled to himself because he knew that Haley was continuing her music without that sleaze ball Chris. Nathan walked back to the room and saw Haley lying on their bed with just a blanket around her smiling at whoever was playing the piano Nathan bought her.

Nathan looked over and saw Chris, with a pair of Nathan's shorts on, playing on Haley's piano. "What the hell is going on here?" Nathan screamed as he barged into the room.

"Nathan!" Haley exclaimed as she covered herself up more with the blanket.

Nathan glared at Haley, and then darted his eyes to Chris, "What the fuck do you think you're doing with my wife?" He asked angrily; before Chris had a chance to say anything Nathan pushed him up against the wall and choked him, "Answer the fucking question…" He said on the point to exploding in anger, "What.The.Fuck.Are.You.Doing.With.My.Wife?"

Haley stood up with the blanket still wrapped around him, "Nathan stop it," she cried as she grabbed a hold of Nathan's arm, "You'll hurt him!"

Nathan released his grip from Chris's throat and stared at Haley, "I want you out," he said sternly but softly, "Out of my house, and out of my life…"

"Nathan," Haley began as her voice began to go, "I'm…"

Nathan threw Haley her clothes and turned and faced Chris, "And you rock star," he said coldly, "Don't let the door hit you on the way out…"

Jake and Brooke walked along a park while Brooke pushed Jenny's stroller, "New York is so beautiful," Brooke said in awe as she watched the orange and red leaves fall from the trees and almost dance on the sidewalk.

"Yeah," Jake said as he looked up at the sky and then looked back to Brooke, "Are you ever going to go back?" He asked as he squinted his eyes.

Brooke looked away from Jake, "I don't want to…"

"I know it's hard Brooke, but you belong in Tree Hill," Jake pointed out, "You've got to go back sometime."

Brooke rolled her eyes, "What about you? You ran away and didn't give two flying fucks about it…"

"I had to," Jake said as he looked down at Jenny.

Brooke nodded in understandment, "The only way I'll go back is if you do…I can't go back to that place Jake…"

"I know it's hard," Jake said, "But you're such a tough person Brooke."

Brooke bit her bottom lip and sighed, "I'm hungry…" Jake nodded and they walked out of the park.

Haley walked into Lucas's room with her eyes red and nose stuffy from crying. Lucas took off his headphones and got up from his bed quickly, "Hales," he said as he hugged her, "What's wrong?"

Haley sniffed, "I think Nathan and I are getting a divorce," she said sadly.

Lucas pulled back from the hug, but still had a hold of his best friend, "What did Nathan do?" He asked.

"He didn't do anything," Haley explained, "He…He walked in on me and Chris and we were…You know…" She said as her voice trailed off.

Lucas released his grip from Haley's arms, "Are you kidding me?" He asked in disbelief.

"I don't know what happened, Luke," Haley said as she sat down on Lucas's bed, "It was so tempting…And I never got a chance to date," she said softy.

Lucas shook his head and sighed, "Nathan loves you Haley!"

"You don't think I know that?" She exclaimed.

"Obviously not," Lucas said, "This isn't like you Haley…What were you thinking?"

Haley stood up, "I wasn't thinking Lucas!" She yelled, "That's the thing! I'm 17 years old; I'm not supposed to be married! I'm supposed to be a teenager, I'm supposed to graduate and get into a good college!"

"Haley," Lucas said trying to calm his best friend down, "You're acting crazy…"

Haley put her face in her hands, "I don't know what to do Lucas…"

"I want to be here for you, but…" Lucas said.

Haley looked at him, "But what?" She asked.

"Nathan's my brother," was all Lucas said.

"And I'm your best friend!" Haley screamed, "You're such a hypocrite! You did the same thing to Brooke with Peyton!"

Lucas glared at her, "Yeah, but I wasn't married to Brooke!"

"This is unbelievable!" Haley said to herself.

Lucas sighed, "Look, I'm here for you Hales, okay? I just can't support you doing this guy while you're still married to Nathan!"

"Whatever," Haley said angrily and barged out of Lucas's room.

Peyton sat at her computer and typed an email to Jake. She sighed and sent the email; she had already sent him ten and was beginning to send him one everyday. Peyton just missed him and Jenny a lot. Peyton heard a knock on her door and saw Anna standing there smiling, "Hey," Peyton said blocking Jenny and Jake out of her head.

"You seem stressed out," Anna said as she sat down on Peyton's bed.

Peyton nodded, "That's why I had you come over…Did you get the stuff from Rick?" She asked.

Anna pulled out the coke and smiled mischievously, "I brought some beers too…"

"Cool," Peyton said as she walked over to Anna, "Thank God my dad isn't around much…He'd kill me if he knew about this shit…"

Anna snorted a line and wiped her nose, "Yeah, me too…" She said and then started laughing. Peyton laughed nervously and looked at the picture of her mom. She looked down at the coke and snorted up a line.

Brooke sat on Jake's couch and watched MTV. Jake had gone out and she was babysitting Jenny for him. Brooke heard a knock on the door and walked over to it and opened it. She saw Lucas standing there and her jaw dropped, "What are you doing here?" She asked in confusion.

"I came to get you," Lucas said.

Brooke looked at him in confusion, "How did you…? Did Jake tell you?" She asked.

"I've known where Jake has been since he left," Lucas said spilling his secret, "And I figured you'd come and live with him…So. Here I am," Lucas said with a warm smile.

Brooke sighed, "I'm not coming back Luke…"

Jake came up behind Lucas and nodded his head, "Yes we are Brooke…"

"Are you guys ganging up on me?" Brooke asked.

They both nodded, "A lot of shit has been going on Brooke," Luke explained, "We need the whole gang back…"

"I can't go back…" Brooke said.

Lucas sighed, "It's not a matter if you can or can't…You have to come back," he said seriously.

Brooke nodded and felt her eyes begin to burn, "I'll pack my stuff," she said as her voice cracked.

Nathan sat at the River court and looked out into the river. All he had on his mind was how Haley could cheat on him, but in the back of his mind he knew that he'd done the same thing to her with Brooke. Brooke, the name reminded him of so many memories and now she was gone. Nathan mainly blamed himself, he knew that he should've chosen between Haley and Brooke, but he couldn't. They were both too special to him. Nathan looked to his left and saw Haley walking towards him; he wished that one day it would be Brooke coming back to him…

"Nathan," Haley said, "I know I made a mistake…"

Nathan stopped her, "Don't say anything Haley…This just proves that we're too young to be married…"

"I love you Nathan," Haley said as tears started to form in her eyes.

Nathan scoffed, "Don't bull shit with me Haley…"

"I'm not," Haley stated, "We made a mistake Nathan. We're too young for this…"

Nathan sighed, "So, are we getting a divorce?"

"Only if that's what you want," Haley said; hoping that Nathan would give her another chance.

Nathan looked down at the ground, "I can't blame you for sleeping with him Hales," Nathan said, "'Cause I haven't exactly been honest with you either…"

"What?" Haley asked.

"But," Nathan said beginning from where he left off, "It doesn't matter what I did anymore…Because we'll both know that what you did was ten times worse…So if that doesn't answer your question Hales, then yes I do want a divorce," Nathan said and stood up from the bench, "I gave you everything," he said in almost a whisper.

Haley closed her eyes, "I know," she whispered, "I know…"

"Now you have Chris," Nathan said coldly, "And he can get you whatever you want, right?" Nathan asked and then walked away leaving Haley alone out in the cold.

"So denied, so I lied, are you the now or never kind?" Brooke sang along to the radio. She was nervous as hell, "I can't believe you guys are making me go back…"

Lucas sighed, "I think Nathan needs you…"

"Why?"

"Hales cheated on him with Chris," Lucas said with disappointment in his voice, "And they're getting a divorce…"

Brooke looked at him in disbelief, "Oh my god…You're kidding."

"I wish I was," Lucas said looking at Brooke and then setting his eyes back on the road and turning the radio up.

_Here's to the nights we felt alive._

_Here's to the tears you knew you'd cry._

_Here's to goodbye_

_Tomorrow gonna' come too soon…_

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	3. 3 Telling Secrets With Your Eyes Closed

Brooke, Lucas, and Jake walked into Brooke's house, "It amazes me how my parents haven't been here for two whole weeks," Brooke said to herself as she looked at the untouched house.

Jake held Jenny in his arms, "I can already smell the drama in the air," he joked.

"Jake and I will unpack your stuff," Lucas offered to Brooke, "You can go see Peyton…"

Brooke rolled her eyes, "She's probably with Anna…"

"Anna?" Jake asked.

"A.K.A. Peyton's new best friend," Brooke said with jealousy, "Maybe you should go see her Jake…I'm sure she'd shit her pants if she saw you…"

Jake laughed, "Alright…Can you guys watch Jenny for me?"

Brooke and Lucas both nodded, "Go talk to her…" Lucas urged.

Jake smiled and left the house. "I'm not supposed to be here," Brooke said softly, "I finally got out of this place, and you come back just to drag me back to this shit hole."

"Brooke," Lucas said, "I tried leaving Tree Hill, but I couldn't do it…"

Brooke looked at him, "The only reason you came back was because of Dan's heart attack."

"True," Lucas said, "But I also came back because I missed this place…I missed the people…I missed my mom…I just missed everything."

Brooke sighed, "That's you Lucas. I don't miss this place, I don't miss the people, and my mom's never around so I sure as hell don't miss her…Getting out of here was the best decision I've ever made."

"You and Nathan are best friends; like me and Hales," Lucas pointed out, "Right now he needs you more than ever."

Brooke slammed down her hand, "No he doesn't Luke!" She exclaimed, "Nathan and I don't need each other; you don't even know the half of it!"

"What are you talking about?" Lucas asked, "You and Nathan are tight."

Brooke hid her face so that Lucas couldn't see the tears forming in her eyes, "We were tight," she corrected him; "Things happened…Things changed."

"What happened?" Lucas asked.

Brooke stopped herself; she knew that she had said too much, "Nothing…Nothing happened at all," Brooke said quickly, "You know, I've got this all under control…You should just leave."

"Brooke," Lucas pleaded, "I'm sorry for whatever I said…"

Brooke stood up and opened her front door, "Please leave…"

Lucas sighed and walked out the door. Brooke watched him walk out and slowly closed the door. When she closed the door she fell to her knees and began to cry.

Peyton woke up slowly and felt her head pounding heavily. She rested her palm on her forehead and groaned softly. She and Anna had gone hardcore last night with the coke and beers. Peyton opened her eyes up and sat up; which made her headache twenty times worse. She saw someone out of the corner of her eye and saw Jake sitting in the chair next to Peyton's desk.

Peyton was speechless, "Jake!" She squealed and got up from her bed; a little too quickly for her hang over to handle. Peyton stumbled over towards him and threw her arms around him, "Jake," she said once more.

"Hey," Jake said rubbing her back lightly. He broke the hug and showed Peyton the container with the coke in it, "What are you doing Peyton?"

Peyton's jaw dropped, "Where did you find that?" She asked.

"On your desk," Jake said, "What are you doing with this shit Peyton?"

Peyton's eyes began to tear up, "I've been having a hard time lately…With you and Jenny being gone…And my mom being gone."

"Look," Jake started, "I'm sorry I've been gone, but I wouldn't have left if I'd of known you were going to start being a crack head…"

A tear fell down Peyton's cheek, "Don't call me that," she said softly.

"Do you know how much this hurts me?" Jake said to her, "I care about you Peyton…"

Peyton snapped her head back up, "You care about me? Then why did you leave?" She screamed, "You left me here with no one!"

"Peyton," Jake said trying to calm her down, "I had to leave or else Nikki would've taken Jenny away from me…"

Peyton closed her eyes and sobbed quietly, "I'm sorry Jake…"

Jake wrapped his arms around her, "It's okay…I'm here to stay…"

"Okay," Peyton said softly and rested her head on Jake's shoulder.

Brooke was curled up in her bed and cried quietly to herself. She thought about her and Nathan, and how he had gotten mad at Haley for cheating on him. They had done the same thing, but it was a big secret. Everything between Brooke and Nathan was a big secret. They must not have wanted it enough. Not badly enough. Brooke wondered why she could be hurt by Nathan when she knew that he wasn't what she wanted forever.

She wanted Nathan to be the one hurt by all of this. There was sadness to when two people break up or stop hooking up, but what destroyed Brooke was the notion that she wasn't necessary to someone anymore. She was disposable. Brooke wanted to be the one to walk away, and then she knew she was worth something.

Lucas walked into Nathan's apartment and saw Nathan sitting on the couch. Nathan looked up and nodded at his brother, "What's up, man?"

"Nothing," Lucas said as he sat down next to Nathan, "How are things going with you?"

Nathan shrugged, "I'm just waiting for Haley to sign the divorce papers…"

"You sent them already?" Lucas asked in disbelief.

Nathan nodded, "I got them last night…"

"Are you sure about this?" Lucas asked.

Nathan sighed, "She was with Chris…She promised me that she wasn't going to see him anymore…"

"Hales made a mistake," Lucas said coming to Haley's defense a little, "I mean, you two love each other."

Nathan scoffed, "We thought we loved each other…We should've never gotten married. It was just all a big mistake. I love her, but I don't trust her enough to be married to her," he pointed out.

"Nate…" Lucas began.

"Look, I've done stupid things to Haley…And I know I have, but I've always loved her. And these stupid mistakes I made show me that Haley and I aren't meant to be married…"

Lucas sighed and nodded his head. There was no use fighting with Nathan about Haley anymore. Lucas walked towards the door and opened, "Brooke's back," was all Lucas said and then walked out of the apartment.

Brooke walked along a little trail in the woods that she always went back to when she was sad or mad or just plain bored. She looked up at the sky and saw that it was turning gray; she didn't care though. Brooke liked the sadden look of the sky, it matched her mood completely.

She sat down on a blanket that she brought and looked out onto the river. The nice thing about this spot was that she could sit there and watch guys play basketball over at the court and they couldn't see her, mostly because they were never looking.

"You're back" she heard Nathan say behind her.

Brooke kept her eyes on the river and nodded her head slowly, "Unfortunately…"

"Did you come back because of what happened between me and Haley?" Nathan asked apprehensively.

Brooke rolled her eyes, "I came back because I was forced too, okay?"

"I know you hate me right now," Nathan began.

Brooke turned around and glared at him, "Hate isn't even the word to explain what I feel towards you…"

"We're best friends Brooke," Nathan said, "So we made some mistakes…"

Brooke scoffed, "I'm just finding it hard how I'm trying not to be mad at Haley for cheating on you because you did the same thing to her!"

"You told me you loved me," Nathan exclaimed, "And now you're just going to throw those feelings away?"

Brooke stood up, "I have to Nathan! We were sleeping together, and you were hurting your wife and I was hurting a friend!" She screamed, "I stopped it because I knew it was wrong!"

Nathan grabbed Brooke's arms gently, "Why can't we just go back to the way we were?"

"Because," Brooke said as she started to cry, "I've already hurt myself…I'm not going to hurt anyone else," she said and then got out of Nathan's grip and walked away.

Nathan watched her leave and walked in the other direction; feeling defeated and upset.

Lucas stood there watching from the river court. He had heard everything the two of them had yelled to each other. He stood there in almost disbelief; all he had running in his head was the fact that Nathan was mad at Haley for doing something he had done, and now Lucas knew the real reason Brooke had left Tree Hill.

Brooke sat at her kitchen table and drank some alcoholic drink she had mixed up at the spur of the moment. She knew that everything about what had done was wrong. Brooke heard someone walk into her house and was praying to God it wasn't Nathan.

Lucas walked into Brooke's kitchen and saw Brooke sitting at the table sipping her drink and her eyes looked red from crying.

"Lucas," Brooke said; her voice weaker from earlier.

Lucas chuckled to himself, "Now I get why you were upset when I brought up Nathan this morning…"

"What are you talking about?" Brooke asked. 'He couldn't know…He couldn't,' she thought to herself.

Lucas stood as stiff as stone and his eyes pierced Brooke's, "I heard you and Nathan earlier today back in the woods…Arguing about whatever," he said knowing he had caught them, "So Brooke, how long have you been sleeping with Nathan?"

"I can explain," Brooke said as she got up from her chair, "Thing's got out of hand one night and…"

Lucas didn't buy it, "And you just kept continued doing it?"

"Lucas you know what it's like!" Brooke exclaimed, "You did the same thing to me…"

Lucas rolled his eyes, "You know, I wish everyone would stop bringing that up."

"You made me come back Luke," Brooke stated, "I left because I knew what I was doing was wrong…"

Lucas crossed his arms, "Maybe I should've listened when you said that you didn't want to come back…" He said and then left the house.

Haley walked into what used to be her and Nathan's apartment…Now it was only Nathan's apartment.

Nathan walked out of the bathroom and was drying his hair, "Do you have the papers?" He asked her nonchalantly.

"I wanted to talk to you first," Haley said her voice said and empty, "I never wanted to hurt you, and I know how much I hurt you and it's killing me…"

Nathan shook his head, "It's not going to work out, Hales. When I saw you in bed naked, and him playing you a song, in my shorts. I lost control."

"I love you Nathan," Haley said, "I truly do."

Nathan sighed, "I love you too Hales…But I can't be married to you anymore…"

"It was all a mistake," Haley said finishing his sentence, "Nathan, I would've given up that night with Chris for you back in my hea-," Haley was interrupted by her cell phone ringing.

Nathan rolled his eyes as Haley got the cell phone out of her purse, "Hello," she said, "This really isn't a good time. I'll talk to you later…Bye," Haley said finishing the conversation.

"Was that Chris?" Nathan asked sternly.

Haley bit her top lip, "…Yes," she said apprehensively.

"Sign the damn papers Haley," Nathan said slamming a pen down in front of her, "And get out of my life…"

Brooke sat outside on her front steps and looked up at the stars. Her life was crumbling before her eyes and she had no idea what to do. Jake walked up to her and sat down beside her, "How was Jenny?" He asked.

"Sleeping like a lamb," Brooke said with a small smile.

"What's wrong?" Jake asked.

Brooke sighed, "Lucas heard Nathan and I arguing today…He knows about what happened…" She said sadly.

"I'm sorry Brooke," Jake said as he put his arm around the brunette, and looked up at the stars.

"Me too," Brooke said quietly to herself as she rested her head against Jake's chest and watched a shooting star.

"Are we going out tonight?" Anna asked as she hopped into Peyton's room giddily.

Peyton laughed, "Not tonight…I'm done with that crap," she said thinking back to Jake.

"Come on," Anna said as she sat down beside Peyton on her bed, "You're the party girl to the max!"

Peyton sighed, "Sorry Anna…"

"Fine," Anna said unwillingly, "I guess I'll just set this coke out on your desk in case you want to draw a stupid picture of it or something," she said setting down the drugs and walking slowly towards the door.

Peyton looked at the drugs and then the picture of Jake and Jenny, "Fine I'm coming…"

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	4. 4 We Might As Well Be Strangers

Brooke sat in her room and looked around. She was alone; and loneliness was like a drug. No matter how hard she tried to not be lonely at the end of the night she was always alone. Brooke walked over to her wall with all the pictures of her and Peyton; she smiled and got her coat. She got in her car and drove to Peyton's house.

Brooke walked into Peyton's room and saw her passed out on the ground, "Peyton!" Brooke screamed as she bent down and tapped her best friend in the arm. Peyton didn't move, "Peyton!" She screamed once more.

Peyton still didn't move.

Brooke stood up straight and called 911 on her cell phone, "My friend is passed out!" She cried into the phone. The operator asked her if she knew what had happened to her friend. Brooke looked around the room and saw an empty container of coke beside Peyton's bed, "I think she may have had a drug overdose..." Brooke said sadly.

Lucas walked into Nathan's apartment and saw him doing homework on the couch. Nathan stood up and put out his hand, "Hey man," he greeted. Lucas punched Nathan in the face. Nathan fell to the ground and grabbed his jaw, "What the fuck, man?"

"I know about you and Brooke," Lucas said with the anger rising in his voice, "I don't get how you can be mad at Haley...You did the same thing to her!" He yelled.

Nathan rubbed his jaw a little bit more, "Did Brooke tell you about it?" He asked.

"No," Lucas answered, "I heard you guys talking from the woods..."

Nathan sighed, "Look Luke," he began, "I know that what I was doing was wrong...But that's all over now."

"So you can fuck Brooke all you want, but once Haley hooks up with a guy once she's suddenly the bad person here?" Lucas asked, "That's a bunch of shit!"

Nathan stood up, "I know it's not fair..." He began to explain.

"I stood up for you!" Lucas exclaimed, "I chose my brother over my best friend because I thought you were a decent guy, but obviously I was wrong," Lucas said as he walked to the door and opened it, "For the second time," he said and walked out of the apartment. Nathan stood there and cringed as the door slammed.

Haley hung onto her bags nervously as she walked into Chris's apartment; it was dirty and she was already missing her and Nathan's apartment, "It's not much," Chris said after noticing Haley's expression, "But...Since we're both singers we'll definitely be making more money," he said and put his arm around Haley.

"I can't do this," Haley said softly and shook out of Chris's grip, "Now that I'm here I realize that this is the last place I want to be..."

Chris looked at her in confusion, "Look, if it's about my living conditions then I'll clean up a bit," Chris said as he started picking up pieces of paper.

"No," Haley said, "I can't be with you Chris...I don't love you and I never will..."

Chris crossed his arms, "And do you honestly think your little hubby is going to take you back?" He asked sarcastically.

"I'm sorry Chris," she said.

"Fuck you Haley!" Chris screamed, "You're such a spoiled little bitch! The only person you care about is yourself!"

Haley backed away, "I care about Nathan."

"I'm sure," Chris said cynically, "You're going to be nothing with him..."

Haley shook her head, "I'll be happy with him."

"I thought you were better than this," Chris said.

"You don't even know me, Chris," Haley retorted, "You don't love me, you don't care about me, you don't know what my favorite movie is, you don't know what my favorite food is, you don't know the real me!"

Chris sighed, "I can hear it through your music..."

"No you can't," Haley stated, "This is wrong," she said and then turned towards the door, "I'm sorry," Haley said once more and walked out. Haley put her bags in her car and slammed the trunk hard. Haley saw Chris looking out over his balcony at her; she looked up at him and then she looked away quickly and got into her car. Her cell phone rang and she looked and saw it was Brooke, "Hello?" She said and heard Brooke crying, "Brooke..." Haley said trying to calm her down.

Brooke sat in the waiting room of the hospital as Jake held her. Brooke shook from the cold and the nervousness, "I can't believe this," Brooke said in between sobs, "I just can't believe this..."

Jake kissed Brooke's forehead softly, "It's going to be okay," he whispered to her. The only thing he could think about was how Peyton had betrayed him; Peyton told him that she was done with all of that, but she lied to him. Jake rubbed Brooke's shoulder and prayed to himself. He knew that he couldn't be mad at Peyton because right now he nor Brooke knew if she was going to be okay.

Haley ran into the hospital and went towards Brooke and Jake, "How is she?" Haley asked nervously.

Brooke could see the tear stains on Haley's cheek and patted the seat beside her, "We don't know yet," Brooke said her voice raspy from crying.

"Are you going to be okay?" Haley asked as she hugged Brooke.

Brooke bit her bottom lip and let a single tear roll down her cheek, "I don't know..."

Lucas walked into the hospital and jogged over towards his three friends. Brooke stood up and hugged him tightly. Lucas let her hug him because he knew Brooke was going through a lot. Lucas rubbed her back as they hugged, "Hey," Lucas whispered in her ear.

"I'm sorry for everything," Brooke whispered back, "I want things to go back to normal," she said and then broke the hug.

Lucas wiped a strand of hair that was stuck to Brooke's cheek. He smiled at her and kissed her softly on the lips, "It's going to be okay..." He assured her.

"Okay..." Brooke said weakly and then pulled herself into him.

Nathan walked slowly into the hospital after recieving Jake's text message. He knew that Brooke and Haley and Lucas were going to be there and he was apprehensive to go in there. He knew that he should be there for Peyton because he cared about her, but the drama and tension was something that he was never good at handling.

Nathan walked into the waiting room and saw Brooke and Lucas hugging. Nathan didn't know whether to be jealous or happy that she had moved on from him, but in a sense he felt that he was the one who was supposed to be hugging Brooke.

Haley saw Nathan and got up slowly and walked up to him, "I'm glad you came," she said softly and gave him a hug.

Nathan looked down at her, "How's Peyton?"

"Nobody knows for sure yet," Haley sighed, "Nathan," she said taking his hand, "I walked out on Chris...I just...I just couldn't do it anymore," she said.

Nathan nodded, "Right now isn't the best time for this Hales," he said quietly and then walked towards the rest of the gang. Haley followed not too close behind and sat down next to Brooke.

An hour or so had passed and Brooke still sat wide awake and sad as ever. She didn't even think that Peyton would turn to drugs; she never expected Peyton to be like that. Brooke's thoughts were interrupted by Anna stumbling into the hospital.

"Brooke," Anna squealed and flung herself towards Brooke, "Where's Peyton?" She asked, "I saw Lucas's away message," she slurred, "And then I went to Patricia's," Anna said drunkenly, "Or Peyton's...And she wasn't there!"

Brooke shushed her, "Your smashed!" Brooke barked at her; she could smell the alcahol on her breath.

"Sorry," Anna giggled.

Brooke glared at the drunken bitch, "Get the hell out of here," she said sternly; trying hard not to raise her voice.

"You can't tell me what the fuck to do!" Anna said getting louder, "You're nothing but a skanky bitch!"

Nathan stepped between the two of them, "You need to leave right now," he said to Anna.

"Only if you fuck me first!" She said and then laughed at herself.

Nathan led Anna towards the door, "Go..." Anna pouted at him and skipped out of the hospital.

Brooke looked behind her and made sure everyone was still asleep; they were, "...Thanks," Brooke said softly.

"No problem," Nathan said as he dug his hands in his pockets, "Do you want some coffee?"

Brooke sighed, "Not really..."

"Yeah," Nathan said, "Me neither..."

Brooke looked at the clock on the wall and bit her lip, "God, what the fuck is taking them so long?" She asked impatiently.

"She's going to be okay..." Nathan said, "It's Peyton...She's a strong girl."

Brooke sat down and shook her head, "You have no idea, Nate."

"I dated her," Nathan said in his defense.

Brooke scoffed, "Having sex with someone doesn't mean you know them," she shot back.

"Sex isn't just sex, Brooke," Nathan said, "It means something most of the time," he siad to her; knowing that the subject hit close to home for the both of them.

Brooke looked at him, "And sometimes it doesn't mean anything," she said coldly.

"Your right," Nathan said giving up, "I don't see why I ever thought it would mean anything..." He said sadly and sat back down next to Haley.

A doctor came out and Brooke sat up quickly, "Hi, do you know anything about Peyton Sawyer yet?" She asked.

The doctor looked at his charts and looked back at Brooke, "She was released about an hour ago..."

Brooke's jaw dropped, "How did we miss her?"

"You may have been sleeping," the doctor said, "She was ready to go and she just signed herself out..."

Brooke rubbed her temples, "Thanks," she said and watched the doctor walk down the hall. Brooke woke up Jake, "She left already," she said to him.

"What?" Jake asked.

Jake walked into his parent's house where he and Jenny were staying. He laid down on his bed and thought about Peyton. She had left, and now he would never get the chance to tell her how much he loved her. Jake rolled over and closed his eyes and opened them; and for a moment he thought he saw Peyton...

Brooke heard a knock on her front door; she opened it and saw Lucas standing there with his hands in his pockets and his head down, "Hey," Brooke said with a small smile.

"Brooke," Lucas said letting her name slide off his tongue, "I just came by to see if you were doing okay..."

Brooke nodded and wrapped her arms around herself, "I'm holding up," she said with a weak laugh, "How are you?"

"I'm worried about Peyton," Lucas answered, "And you..."

Brooke smiled, "Thanks..." She said greatfully.

"I'm sorry about the things I said to you the other day..." Lucas said looking down at the ground, "I just....I was angry," he explained.

Brooke nodded, "I deserved it..." She said, "I needed to hear that what I was doing was wrong..."

"You're a great person Brooke," Lucas said.

"I just do some stupid things," Brooke finished. Lucas smiled and gave Brooke a hug, "This means a lot Luke," she said and then they both pulled away from the hug.

Lucas titled his head and leaned in. His lips met Brooke's and a warm sensation filled Brooke's body. She placed her hand lightly on his cheek while Lucas ran his fingers through her hair.

Nathan sat in his car and watched the two of them kissing. He felt stupid for spying on them, but he had come to apologize to Brooke and he had to witness this. Nathan sighed and drove down the rode.

Nathan walked into his apartment and minutes later heard a light knock on the door; he opened it and saw Haley standing there, "I have nowhere else to go," she said sadly.

Nathan nodded and opened the door wider. Haley walked into the apartment and hugged Nathan tightly, "You can stay here for the night," he said softly.

Haley looked up and kissed him softly on the lips.

Peyton sat on the ground and shivered as she looked at her mother's gravestone, "I'm sorry mommy..." She cried, "I'm sorry..."

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